Bullet For A Bullet
by inkwheels
Summary: What if Paddy took a shot in Jane's direction that day


It's been a week since the shooting, and thanks to Maura's father, I got my gun taken away as evidence and I've got a bullet hole in my shoulder. Had he not have been there, neither would have happened and I'm pissed off about it.

I'm also mad because Maura's mad. In her mind, it seems to be okay for him to shoot me but not okay for me to shoot him; a man wanted for murder. Really?

And then there's Agent Dean; that slimy little bastard who used me because he wanted info on Doyle, and probably Maura. I'll never forgive myself for sleeping with him and I'm beyond excited that our "relationship" has not only become fair game in my interrogations with Internal Affairs, but it's now the talk of the precinct.

Fucking great.

_FLASHBACK_

"No!" Maura yelled out towards me as I aimed my gun at her father after he aimed his at me.

I blocked her voice out as I went into cop mode and didn't hesitate in pulling the trigger. I felt my life was being threatened when I saw the gun aimed at me and I was right. At the same time I pulled my trigger, Paddy pulled his. My bullet hit him in the side and his bullet hit me in the right shoulder. I saw him jolted backwards just as I went back as well, and the next thing I heard was wood cracking and a loud thud.

Frost was over me in seconds tell me not to move so I couldn't see what was going on. All I could hear was Maura crying.

After fighting with Korsak, Frost and Frankie for a bit, I managed to get to my feet; albeit painfully. "I'm not getting wheeled out of here on a gurney. I can walk for Christ sake." With my hand clutched over my wound, I fought back the nausea that threatened me as I looked down and saw my once yellow shirt was now stained with blood.

"Detective Rizzoli!" Cavanaugh yelled to me as he entered the warehouse. "What the hell happened here?"

"Long story, Lieutenant, any chance I can tell ya later? I kinda have to get this taken care of," I said as I motioned to my shoulder.

"I need your gun, its evidence."

"What? It was a clean shoot!"

"Please, Rizzoli. Don't fight me on this one. We have to make sure this is all by the book if we want to nail Doyle."

"He shot a Federal Agent AND a Boston Homicide Detective! What the hell, Lieutenant!"

Frost handed the Lieu my gun and I gave him an angry look. I know he was only doing his job and I shouldn't have but I couldn't help myself.

"Where's Maura?" I asked.

"She's outside. They're loading Paddy into the ambulance. You better get to the hospital too you look like you're about to pass out."

"I'm fine," I said through gritted teeth as I brushed past him and went outside. "Unfortunately, he was right."

I saw Maura standing by the ambulance talking to her father. They wouldn't let her go with him and shut the doors on her before pulling away; siren blaring.

"Maura!" I yelled out to her.

She glared at me, her arms folded over her chest as I approached. "Are you happy now?"

"What? What are you talking about?"

"My father's probably going to die thanks to you. Now you get to gloat about how you and your boyfriend Agent Dean took down the head of the Irish Mob."

Anger ignited within me and I took my bloodied hand away from my wound. "See this? I've got _your _father's bullet in my shoulder. He's a _murderer _and I'm a _cop_."

"He shot you because you shot him!"

I closed my eyes and looked away from her. "Oh my God, I can't even believe you just said that. He aimed his gun at me, Maura. Fuck, he shot Agent Dean!"

"He wouldn't have shot you if you hadn't shot him first."

"Come on Maura, that's bullshit and you know it!" I winced and took in a deep breath as my head began to swim. My body was starting to shut down.

"Jane?" Korsak called out to me as I felt him come up behind me, taking my arm. It's a good thing he did because at that moment someone turned the lights out.

_END FLASHBACK_

I spent a few days in the hospital which actually turned out to be a good thing because the medication they had me on kept me out of it and I didn't have to deal with any of this shit. Now I'm on my way into the precinct because I want my gun back. Cavanaugh told me I was cleared in the shooting and that I could have my gun back, he just didn't realize that I took that as "come and get it." Besides, sitting at home in pain is just making me cranky so this would take my mind off it for a little while.

"What the hell are you doing here, Rizzoli?" the Lieutenant asked me as I stood in his doorway.

"I came to get my gun."

He shook his head. "You're on medical leave, couldn't this wait?"

"No," I said as I reached out and took it from him. "I think just having it back makes me feel like I can move on. It will never make it all go away, but it's a step forward."

"I never doubted you for a second, Rizzoli, you know that. Now we just have to wait for Doyle to get a little bit better so we can haul his ass to Walpole."

"I'll feel a lot better when he's behind bars. Then we can really put all of this to rest."

"Agreed, now go on and get out of here and get better, that's an order," he said to me with a smile.

"Thanks, Lieutenant."

While getting my gun back lightened my mood somewhat, I was still lugging around unfinished business – Maura. Instead of heading out to my car, I found myself hitting the down button on the elevator.

When I got downstairs to her office, I found Dr. Pike sitting at her desk. "Where's Dr. Isles?"

He looked up at me, "At the hospital with her father." Looking back down at his paperwork, he shook his head. "This office is atrocious. It's taking me forever to make heads or tails of her notes. For a professional she has the handwriting of a two year old."

I decided it was best not to answer him and I don't think he even noticed because as I walked down the hallway I could still hear him rambling to himself.

* * *

When I got to the hospital, I found Maura heading in my direction with a cup of coffee. She looked at me and then looked down at her cup. "What are you doing here, Jane?"

"I came to talk to you."

"This isn't the place to argue. I need to get back to my father." With that, she turned and walked into his room, leaving me alone in the hall.

I stood there for a minute and then followed her.

"What are you doing?" she asked angrily.

"I want to know why you're siding with him; why you think nothing of him putting a bullet in me. What if I wasn't so lucky and he killed me? _Then_ would you think that it was wrong?"

"Will you keep your voice down? My father is lying here because of _you_ and almost lost his life because of _you_, Jane."

"Mmmaura?" Doyle mumbled.

If Maura wasn't in the room, I might have been tempted to smother him to death with his pillow. Hell, I might do it _with_ her in the room.

"It's okay, I'm right here," she assured him.

My shoulder was starting to ache even more and my patience was wearing thin.

"You should go," she said as she turned to look at me.

I moved closer to Doyle, ignoring Maura. "Would you have killed me?"

"Jane! Please!"

"Yesss," he slurred. "You…you're a c..op. Don't l…like co..ps."

"Interesting from a man who told me to look out for his daughter and now you want me dead."

"Jane, stop!"

"Watch..your..self…Detective," Doyle mumbled.

"So now you're threatening me. I'll be sure to add that to your list of charges."

Doyle was starting to get agitated now. If he wasn't so hurt, he probably would have lunged out of the bed at me.

"You shot me…put me here."

"Don't. Let it go," Maura said, trying to calm him.

"No!" he grunted, trying to sit up. "…tried to kill me...I don't forget…" He lay back down, closing his eyes in pain.

"Do whatever you want to me just leave her out of it." I looked at Maura before leaving the room.

As I walked down the hallway, Maura called out to me. "Jane! Jane, wait!"

I didn't turn around and kept walking.

* * *

After a couple of beers, I was beginning to forget about the dull ache in my shoulder. That was, until I had to get up and answer the door because someone was knocking on it.

Opening it, I found Maura standing there. "What do you want?"

"Can I come in? We need to talk."

"Oh, so _now_ you want to talk," I said as I moved away from the door to go sit back down. "What, did daddy Doyle tell you to come here?"

She didn't respond and quietly shut the door as I sat down on the couch, grabbing the remote and flipping through the channels.

Stepping in front of the TV, she shut it off.

"Really, Maura?"

She crossed her arms over her chest. "I'm sorry about what he said to you."

I shrugged and instantly regretted it; closing my eyes and biting my bottom lip. "Why are _you_ apologizing for _him_? Those were his words, not yours."

She looked away from me.

"What he said is a perfect example of why I've tried to tell you he's not a good guy, Maura. And the fact that you've latched onto him like he's Father of the Year just makes me mad and maybe even confused as to why you don't understand."

"I do now," she said softly. She looked back up at me, her eyes locking onto mine as hers filled with tears. "I'm sorry."

I took in a breath and sighed heavily.

"Even though you shot my father, I would never want you to get hurt because of it, and you did."

"But do you understand _why_ I shot your father? It's not like I did it just for the hell of it."

"I do understand," she said as she sat down next to me. "I've had time to think about it and given what he just said to you, I really understand now."

I didn't say anything because I really didn't know what else to say.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm on leave for about a month and am already bored out of my skull."

"I'm sorry that I didn't come to visit you. I…I just wasn't in the right state of mind at the time and I…well…I couldn't handle it." She moved closer to me.

I had to admit, I wasn't as mad at her as I was a few days ago, but my anger for her father was off the charts.

"May I?" she asked, pointing to my shoulder.

I tilted my head. "Maura. It's fine. Leave it. And don't try to distract me by playing nurse."

"It's not working?"

"No," I said with a small smile. "Seriously though, I'm sorry that I was put in a position where I had to shoot your father, but why was your father there to begin with?"

"I don't know. I didn't tell him anything, I swear to you. I asked him and he wouldn't tell me how he knew about the sting at the warehouse. Why was Agent Dean there?"

"I asked him if he followed me and he said no. I haven't spoken to him since this happened and honestly don't want to see him ever again in fear I might rip his head off and shove it up his ass."

"I'm sorry I reacted so strongly at the scene."

I could tell her apology was sincere. "You've had a lot to deal with lately so I understand."

"Are we okay then? Because I don't like to fight with you and…" she looked down at her hands, "I've been lost without you this past week. It would have been nice to have you by my side during all of this but I realized I made that impossible to do."

"I'm sorry, Maura, this whole thing got so screwed up." I reached over and patted her arm. "So how did you leave it with your father?"

"I told him to leave you alone. He didn't seem to want to do that, so I walked out and told him I never wanted to see him again."

"You know that's not going to stop him."

"I know," she said as she looked at me, tears rolling down her cheeks.

"There's nothing I can do, Maura. I'm not going to put my life on hold and wait for him to send someone after me. Besides, if he really does care about you he would realize that I do whatever I can to protect you."

"But what if he doesn't get that?"

I shook my head. "Then that's his loss and I'll deal with whatever happens _if_ it ever happens."

Before I knew it, she had her arms around me; sobbing. "I'm so sorry," she whispered in my ear.

All I could do was hold her and I held her for quite a while.


End file.
